A Friend's Suggestion

A good friend of mine told me I should start my own blog. I was a little leery of this, I honestly don't believe that anyone would want to read about me. Why would they? I'm not interesting, at least I don't think so, but my friend stated very colorfully I might add that I am a "damn good writer" and that there are millions of people out there who can relate to my life.

okay...

I live a crazy life, well at least to me it is crazy. I find myself in situations that to most normal people seem rather abnormal but to me seem perfectly sane. I may end up ruining some relationships with this blog, but maybe I need to start getting stuff out there and finding other people who seem to be dealing with the same challenges that I am.

I'm going to try not to get too personal and I will talk in generalizations mostly to protect those innocent people in my life who could inadvertently be hurt by things said on this blog. If you are a friend and you know me personally please know that in no way am I trying to air any dirty laundry or trying to libel anyone.

no names will be used and situations will be written in such a way that no one will know who they are about.

But, my friend is right. I need to get this out in the open, I need to share my life experiences with others. I lived in such a sheltered gilded cage for so long that now I am becoming free of that cage, I find that freedom is rather scary.

Like in the movie "The Shawshank Redemption" when the old man is paroled after spending his entire life in prison. He can't handle it, because in prison he had identity, but in his freedom he had no identity, and felt that he was just too old to re-create himself.

Well, I am not too old to come out of my Chrysalis. A Caterpillar can't be a butterfly unless it fights its way out of its cocoon on its own with no help. However, once out a butterfly's beauty becomes its enemy. Everyone wants to capture that butterfly and put it back in captivity, to keep its beauty for their own selfish desires, never letting anyone else enjoy the beauty of the butterfly freely flying in the happy environment.

So what am I eluding to? What captivity? Well friends that is for u to decide. What prison do u find yourself in? But what is most important is what is keeping from being paroled from your prison?

To the wardens out there. Why do you hold on to something that needs to be free? I am sure for most people it is insecurity and fear. We hold on so desperately to the things we think give us joy only to find out we have smothered the life right out of them. We do that in our relationships, in our faith, in our ideology, in our day to day activities, an in our jobs.

Friends we are prisoners and wardens in our lives, constantly hoarding our feelings and emotions for ransom, only releasing them when it becomes convenient for us to let others take pleasure in them.

And so, I come to the close of my first blog...now let us see if anyone reads it.

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